It's October which also means it is Selective Mutism awareness month! I have created some communication cards for those with SM. They are geared towards children but anyone of any age can use them. They are easy to download and print at home! You can view and download them using the link below! If you have any other ideas for cards let me know!
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Finding a therapist or mental health professional can feel overwhelming and challenging, especially when it comes to Selective Mutism. I want to give you a few resources to start your search. I also recommend reading this article to help your search. It explains the different types of therapists of mental health professionals and also how to find a therapist.
The Selective Mutism Association provides a list of treating professionals that work with children with SM. They also give advice on how to find one that is right for you or your family. Please note that I am not familiar with many of the professionals listed on this site, and therefore recommend that you do your research before beginning treatment. https://www.selectivemutism.org/find-help/find-a-treating-professional/ The National Register of Health Service Professionals also offers a database of verified psychologists across the United States. This website allows you to search by location, area of expertise, types of treatment, languages, and insurance. www.findapsychologist.org/ Psychology Today also provides a large directory of mental health professionals. They have therapists located in 20 different countries. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists Note: If you or someone you know is in an emergency/crisis situation please get help immediately. If the situation is life-threatening, call 911. In a mental health crisis, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK or use the Crisis Text Line. I’m going to be starting a series here about religious trauma. Of course, everyone’s experience with faith is different, but I want to talk about the ways that my church affected me. I grew up going to church which my family was heavily involved in. I was constantly emotionally and spiritually manipulated by people that I was supposed to trust. I am hoping that this blog series will help me open up about what has happened in my life, and I will be able to help others through who have gone through similar situations. This first post will be discussing prayer and mental health.
I have struggled with Selective Mutism and issues related to anxiety and depression my entire life. The church leaders I grew up listening to said that you just needed to pray and trust God to cope with your worries. God could take care of everything. It was supposed to be a simple formula. Your problem + Trusting God = Problem gone away and no more fear. But praying about my anxieties just made them worse because prayer felt so forced. I thought that I could only deal with my problems through prayer. I didn’t allow myself to deal with my anxiety in any other way or to develop any healthy coping mechanisms. When praying didn’t make my anxiety go away, my anxiety would get worse. I felt like I was doing something wrong and that I wasn’t giving God enough of my trust or my heart. I was also taught that emotions aren’t trustworthy. How we feel isn’t the truth. Sure this can apply to when my depression tells me that I am worthless, and the truth is actually that I am enough and am incredibly valuable. But I do need to listen to what is going on inside of my mind when I get overwhelmed with a sensory overload. Emotions are indicators for us. They let us know there is something that needs to be attended to. We can’t slap a prayer on our problem or worry like a band-aid and expect it to go away. Spiritual bypassing doesn’t allow us to deal with the actual mental and emotional health concerns that need to be met. I eventually was able to accept other ways of dealing with anxiety and began to realize the harm that this pressure to pray had done to me. Everyone needs more than one way of managing their mental health. Now I take time to rest when I can feel my anxiety building. I’m learning to process the emotions and understand why I feel the way I do. October is Selective Mutism awareness month. I am very excited to continue to spread awareness for SM this month, but how does someone raise awareness?
Many people argue that an awareness month, week, or day, for a cause does nothing. After all, the US has over 200 officially recognized awareness days. (you can see all of them here), and there are many more unofficially recognized ones that are sponsored by organizations including Selective Mutism awareness month. "Raising awareness" can seem pointless to some people, and there isn't a ton of evidence into what good these awareness months do. With social media, awareness days are on the rise. Yeah sure, social media can reach many people, but does this kind of activism actually work? It is a great way to educate people, but it's not a great tool for real social change. People often substitute knowledge for activism. Sharing a post or constantly posting an awareness ribbon will never be the same as advocating. Sure, it will make us feel like we've done something meaningful for the world, but really we haven't done much. What's the point of raising awareness then? Why would I even be writing this for the internet if social media was pointless? I am encouraging people to do something about the lack of understanding of Selective Mutism. I'll still let you share about Selective Mutism on social media and join those SM Facebook groups. Let's do something else for Selective Mutism. Let your activism go beyond the month of October. What can you do to really advocate for Selective Mutism this month?
Sources: https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/04/what-good-is-raising-awareness/391002/ https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2010/10/04/small-change-malcolm-gladwell http://barnraisersllc.com/2017/12/awareness-months-work-best-practices/
The silence that comes from SM is an absence of sound and is quiet, but it is not peaceful or tranquil or calm. My silence comes from the opposite. There is nothing peaceful about having an anxiety disorder. It can be terrifying. My mind is definitely not silent. In my experience, this word can mean the exact opposite of what the dictionary and many people say it is. I often hear that "silence is golden". Sure, being a good listener is a good trait to have. Being able to listen well has helped me, but having a difficult time talking is frustrating and unhelpful.
I would advise people be careful about what they say about people with Selective Mutism. I had a lot of people growing up asking me why I was so quiet as if I would magically be able to respond to them. Often, they mistook it for me being sweet and innocent especially as I began talking. Not that those characteristics were wrong, but they were wrong about my silence. -Ellie This story was republished on The Mighty! www.themighty.com/2019/01/silence-selective-mutism-not-what-you-think It is important to share our stories of living with Selective Mutism or any other condition. Sharing helps create a community and raises awareness for SM. It lets other people see that they are not alone in their struggles, and we can support them through difficult times. Sharing our stories can break the stigma around mental health. By sharing, we are showing people that we do not have to be ashamed of our mental illness. Sharing our story can bring healing to our own lives. (This is a great article our sharing your story!)
So, I am introducing a new page on the SMAware website! You can read other's stories or share your own story of living with Selective Mutism or another Mental Illness. If you want to share your story there is a lot of freedom and flexibility, but here are some basic guidelines for sharing your story.
Here's an infographic that I made about Selective Mutism. Feel free to share it to help spread awareness about Selective Mutism!
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